on plans, and the troubles with making them

As it is, I’ve already failed miserably on this 365-blog-a-day gig I’ve imposed on myself. Oh w-e-e-ll… At least, however, I think I’ve managed to salvage this little failure (yes, I’m consoling myself here..) by having posted sensible and somewhat like-worthy posts (thank you, kind fellow bloggers). I’ve decided to look back a bit on the past month and reflect on what’s transpired in my life, successful and failed plans included.

On blogging – Well, here I am, still raring to go despite the setback on not actually blogging daily. It really wasn’t as easy as I thought, especially during days when I felt so whipped from a day’s work that I just wanted to drop dead on my bed as soon as I got home. I must say though that this exercise of blogging, and just writing, has been quite therapeutic. It’s helped me organise the mostly jumbled thoughts in my mind, most of which runs in non-intersecting figures of 8’s that I have trouble catching up sometimes.

On writing – Speaking of writing, well I’m glad to say that I have begun my little book project, which I hope to finish sometime…soon. Yes, I’m writing a book, gendemmit, and I shall finish it!!! (deep breaths…)  I feel that I have to declare this to the world, or at least to the internet universe, so I’ve got some witnesses, and so I’ll feel guilty enough to force myself to studiously work on said project. Plot and little samples to be shared at a later date…Maybe.

For inspiration, I’m now reading Stephen King‘s auto-bio, entitled On Writing. I can relate with what he said in it, “…stopping a piece of work just because it’s hard, either emotionally or imaginatively, is a bad idea. Sometimes you have to go on when you don’t feel like it, and sometimes you’re doing good work when it feels like all you’re managing is to shovel shit from a sitting position.” Good stuff, I tell you.

On reading – I have faithfully pursued my resurrected passion-slash-favorite-hobby and I am glad. I plan to continue reading just about anything that suits my fancy and not just the supposed usual best-sellers. A quote I stumbled on by Haruki Murakami always reverberates in my mind whenever I decide on what to read next – “If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” from Norwegian Wood. True, isn’t it?

On plans – I don’t want to make this into a ranting sort of piece, so I’ll just say this generally. Since the first day of the year, I have so far made one big, spells-my-future decision that I had to really ponder over during the holidays, but which ended up feeling like one big lemon in the first place. Not that I didn’t think it was the right choice, because it is, especially for where I am in my life right now. But it just felt like a waste of effort and unnecessary anxiety, having had to toss and turn over it. Then again, I guess that’s what makes for good but tough decisions, no? Either you live with it, or you don’t. I’m happy to say that I’m living with mine… and I’m okay.

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